7/7 A day of Remembrance

Today is a bit of a sad day for me. It is the four year mark of my great grandmother's passing. I definitely think about her more and more as the wedding day steadily approaches. I would have loved for her to have seen Mr. Golden and I get married being that I am the first one out of all the great grandchildren to make that step. But it would be unfair for me to wish such a thing because if she were still here, I'm sure she'd be suffering and I'd like to think that she is in a much better place.

I thought it would be easier to write this post after four years, but it's not. The only way I find solace is knowing that she met and approved of Mr. Golden when she was still here. One of my all time favorite memories of her with Mr. Golden and I was at a family BBQ back in 2004:

I was irritating my mom {something I do frequently} and my mother jokingly said to Mr.Golden along the lines of, "Handle my light work, get her away from me." Him being 6'3 and me being 5'2, he turned around and picked me up over his shoulder. My great grandmother was sitting in the chair all along, and said in those old-lady voices, "Oooh chile, I sure hope he don't be beating on you."

Everybody starting cracking up. It was her funny, outlandish comments and witty personality that made everyone in her presence fall in love with her. She is truly missed, but will always be remembered and remain apart of us in our hearts and memories.

RIP great grandma: the only one who used to play Old Maid with me and allow me to win almost every time!

Right Hand Girl

Standing next to every good woman is always a good...woman! No it's not a typo, I'm talking about my Maid of Honor {MOH}. I always knew that when I got married my cousin Nikki would be my MOH. We are two months apart and have built a strong relationship over the years.

I've mentioned before that I have an older half sister on my father's side who I love dearly, but growing up she did not live with us and I didn't get to see her that much. My cousin often felt like the sister I never had.

I was surfing the web the other day when I found the following picture. My jaw dropped and then came the "awwww". I can not wait for the photographer to catch a shot like this of Nikki and I on the big day. And I'm sure her smile will be even bigger!

photo credit: Jennifer Bowen Photography

My Ace

With Mother's Day just around the corner, today's post is about the lovely lady in my life. I know most girls say that their mother is their best friend, but SERIOUSLY, my mom is my life. My mom had me when she was 18 years old and even though she was merely a child herself, I can't remember a time in my life when she wasn't there. She grew up fast, embraced her role as a mother, and has been there for me every step of the way. One of the greatest things she has taught me is to alway have the courage to follow my dreams. She is my number one fan and supporter with any endeavor I pursue.

People always say to me, "Wow, your mother must be so proud of you" to which I reply, "Yes she is, but I'm really proud of her." She is the woman, wife, and mother that I've always aspired to be. Now that my brother and sister {twins} are in the picture, we don't get to spend as much one on one time together {I was the only child for 16 years with the exception of my older half sister on my father's side}, but one of my favorite moments in the day is when my father and the twins are sleep and my mom and I have our night-cap in the living room to talk about any and everything.

I thoroughly get saddened about the thought of leaving home next year. I often joke around with my mother that the doctor's never cut the umbilical cord. I don't even know how to end this blog post because there's so much to say, but...

On the day of the wedding she will be the only one in the room while the dress maker is dressing me. I'm sure it will be an emotional moment with her probably trying to calm me down...

photo credit: Jennifer Bowen Photography

Only for the both of us to start crying.

photo credit: Holritz Photography

And she will escort me down the aisle along with my father...not "giving me away" but giving me the opportunity to be a wonderful wife to my soon to be husband as she has been to hers.

photo credit: Jennifer Bowen Photography

Thank you for everything mom. I love you immensely!

The First Man To Ever Love Me...

I'm far from being a daddy's girl. My father and I have been to hell and back, but we're at a good place now and I appreciate all the tribulations that have brought us here.

One thing that can be said is that he has always been in my life. He's a great provider to my mother and my siblings, and he means well- even when he makes his mouth up to say things I don't neccessarily want to hear. I could never hate him, because as I've grown into a woman, I realized that I am him.

I love my dad. I may not show it as much as I should, but he was the first man to ever love me. I can't wait for him to walk me down the aisle. He jokes around that he can't wait to "give me away", but I'll never be away from him. He will always hold a special place in my heart.

Look at how the father in this picture looked at his "little girl". My dad is not the msuhy type of guy, but we'll see if he tears up when he sees me for the first time on my wedding day.

Photo Credit: Alain Martinez Photography

Here's me and my dad: